How to Choose a Knife for Self-Defense

The process of selecting a knife—much like the processes entailed in selecting a motor vehicle or pair of boots—depends entirely on the primary and secondary purposes you wish the given object to serve. My wife, for example, drives a Nissan Leaf as her primary means of transportation (while also fulfilling her secondary goals of conserving fossil fuels and maintaining hippie street cred), but said vehicle does not meet my primary automotive purpose of having something reliable to haul shit around in, like my motorcycle, for example, or trash to take to the dump. For these reasons and more, I drive a truck.